it is far away from july 23rd, but still quite applicable. i am trying and reaching outward. i have been flexing and stretching some muscles that i forgot that i had. i am rembering that i like to howl at the moon- and i am taking the time to do so.
a bit on the hidy side? yes… but i am emerging and feeling better and braver than i have in quite some time.
some musings on my dream day
Inspired, once again, into action by Shimelle’s class My Freedom I shall list some of the spaces online that I find inspiration….
I could go on and on, but for now I shall stop here. I think that this is a topic that I will end up revisiting…….
So on to the travel portion of class with Shimelle– and thinking about what I have in my suitcase when I travel. Jon, my husband would say too much… and well about half way into any trip I agree with him… but before that I must pack and when I pack here are some must have items…….
journal
pencils and pen
possibly travel watercolors if I think I will have time to paint
reading- usually some novel and a book of poetry
something to knit
a camera
music- most recently an ipod
(have you noticed the lack of practical stuff?)
jeans
wonderful shoes… one pair of wonderfully comfy and another of wonderful looking(usually heals that i don’t wear)
black dress
black pants
shirts- usually of the jersey variety
something comfy to sleep in
some kind of sweater or hoodie or sweater hoodie
Time.
I am taking Shimelle’s class, My Freedom and it started today and the first bit is meant to get us thinking about time and travel. Today I naturally thought of time.
Today is the tenth anniversary of my father’s death. It still seems surreal to me even as I write those words. Ten years… I mean how is that even possible? I am not quite sure. I was supposed to feel like an adult 10 years again when this happened and now I am 30 and in the thick of this adult thing and I still don’t quite feel it.
According to Shimelle we will be looking into our relationship with time this week in the class and for me that has always been a very tricky relationship.
I remember being young and feeling as if time poured by in a painfully slow way. It was never quite the time that I wanted it to be. I was always waiting for something else… for summer, for school to begin, for something or someone- always, it seemed, waiting.
It has not been that way for quite some time now. Time passes in a blur- I don’t know where it has gone or how I got here. I am savoring and I am enjoying- don’t get me wrong, but truly where did it go?
How has it been ten years since I picked up the phone with a “Beanstalk- how can I help you?” to hear my step mom tell me that she thought I should come home because he wasn’t doing well. To the drive where I pulled into the driveway as an ambulance prepared to leave- jumping into the car with my step mom and my father’s best friend so that we could follow the ambulance to the emergency room where I would see and talk to my father for the last time. Ten years. Impossible it seems. It is either so far away that it happened to another person in another lifetime- or it was a year ago… I am not sure, but ten- no, that doesn’t seem right… possible…..
Yeah, me and time an odd thing. So it seems that this exploration into time and my relationship with it is quite needed- already it has my brain reeling.
I see: branches of oaks covered in green in canopies overhead, thunder clouds, dragon flies and a sleeping kitten.
I hear: i have been on an ani difranco kick this past week (okay, for several years now) so I hear ani raising some hell- which is always a good thing.
I taste: our garden- this week we have gotten yellow squash, soy beans, cucumbers, tomatoes and beans…. an explosion of yum.
I smell: our garden(do you sense a theme)- which continues to flourish- the tomato plants top this list of smells putting out the most wonderful aroma.
I touch: rain drops- what an odd change from living in London just a year ago when rain fell and fell- here in Georgia we wait for rain and it is so lovely when it falls- which it did 3 or 4 times this week. Wondermous indeed.
When Erin at Design for Mankind started talking about her magazine I knew that it would indeed be wonderful, but this has just blown me away. It is gorgeous, thoughtful and so inspiring. Thank you Erin for amazing me once again. If you haven’t yet basked in the loveliness of this magazine’s debut you can find it here for free download or you can purchase a hard copy to carry with your everywhere here for a mere 8.95.
Wowness!
Shimelle, wonderful scrap booking goddess and wonderful friend has a new online class starting on Monday called My Freedom. If you have never taken one of her classes- you must hurry over and correct this immediately- as they are so wonderful, inspiring and so much fun. If you have taken a class with her already – I assume you are no longer reading this, but have jumped over to her site that you can sign up right away.
I can’t wait to start. I hope to see you there.
i am feeling oh so very slow at the moment- as though there is something , some lesson that i ought to have gotten by now, but i missed it. it is there looking at me-saying come on i am right here! and i am all… wtf?
i feel off balance and out of it and it seems like i should be able to tell what it is i need to break out of this, but i am at a loss. is it because i am trying to figure it out? is that the problem? this notion that i can somehow find this out?
oh…. feeling very woe is i- it happens- suppose. what do you do when you feel all woe is i? any suggestions….
Woot! Tis time to scrap your day again. I can’t wait. Join us and you too can document your day.
Seeing: Words from the book Reading Lolita in Tehran– not, in many ways, what I expected, but what a lovely book. Certainly there is much in the way of political commentary, but to me the book was more than that. Nafisi finds a way to invite you into one of her literature classes allowing you to become intimate with both the characters in the books they are reading and the characters in the class room. It offers wonderful and new to me perspective on the readings and offers some thought provoking answers to the question “Why is literature important?” To me, the book was much more personal than political- and acted in a sense as proof to the answer of literature’s importance- to allow one to see and understand the world from a different perspective. A wonderful book.
Hearing- Willa picking at the screen door- telling me she would like to come inside, our armadillo neighbor rustling in the leaves
Tasting- lots and lots of fresh vegetables and fruit… While our garden is not quite spilling over with food we have been taking advantage of local farmers who started their planting much earlier than us… because of this we have been feasting on corn, squash, tomatoes, peaches, melons, strawberries, blueberries and some beans and spinach from our own little garden. Yum is all I can say- so much of the yum.
Smelling- did I mention all the fruits and vegetables… yes I did… Mostly I have been smelling those and all of the wonderful goodness that has been coming out of our kitchen because of all of the amazing fresh food. More yum.
Touching: Took some time this week to play with paper and put together my pages for the 25th of May for Shimelle’s Scrap Your Day. I continue to be really excited about this project. I look forward to having a year’s worth of 25th’s to look back on. I think it will be wonderful.
jen h mont 